Loudounia, Quo Plus Minus Est

By Charles Houston

That translates to “Loudoun, where more is less” and refers to its government. I’m interested in the bureaucratic nature of entities as they get larger and attempt to do more and more things. This is a fantasy about an alternative way of doing things, using Loudoun as a template.

My thoughts are grounded in the seminal and humorous “Up the Organization,” written by the late Robert Townsend, the former Avis CEO.

Townsend (1920 – 1998) was a corporate anarchist – cut staff, listen to customers, be guided by ideas that percolate from below as opposed to dictats from above, get rid of HR departments, eliminate executive perks. Following these ideas and coining the slogan, “Avis. We try harder,” he pulled the company up to a strong position in the car rental world.

What if Townsend were reincarnated and ran Loudoun County?

Townsend Returns

“Robert, thanks for coming back,” said Governor Spotswood with much bonhomie. “I need you to try something.”

“Good to be back, Alex. There’s a lot I don’t recognize!”

“You wouldn’t recognize Loudoun County, for sure,” said the governor.

“I assume it’s grown a lot; probably still wealthy,” Townsend replied.

The governor said, “Yeah, but it has problems. Have you followed the news lately?”

“No,” replied Townsend, “there weren’t any newspapers where I was.”

“There’re no newspapers here anymore, Robert,” explained Spotswood, “Check the Internet.”

“What’s an Internet?” asked Townsend.

The governor chuckled, “Let me explain.”

Loudoun Afire

Spotswood tapped on a keyboard, then turned the monitor toward Townsend. “This is the internet web page of The Blue Ridge Leader, it’s Loudoun’s dominant news source. Check these articles: A SWAT squad had to go to a School Board meeting; three Board members were arrested for disorderly conduct. Two days later, three of the constitutional officers started scuffling in the courthouse lobby. Security guards broke that up. At its last meeting, some Supervisors went ape. There was a brawl, and one Supervisor left by giving one-finger to the others.”

“Gads!” Townsend exclaimed. “So, problems.”

“Exactly,” Spotswood said. “Taxes are through the roof. County staff has grown metastatically and become a power unto itself. Recent Boards have let Loudoun’s government get too big, do too many things. They’re focused on process, not results.” Spotswood concluded.

“That’s what happens to most bureaucracies and most governments. Taxpayers deserve an efficient government,” said Townsend. “I’ve got an idea, Alex. Appoint me Administrator with executive power over the county, the constitutional officers, and so on.”

The governor agreed, “That’s what I hoped you’d say.”

“I’ll make radical changes, then we’ll start operating efficiently,” Townsend promised.

“Let’s do it,” concurred Spotswood.  

A Hostile Takeover

Townsend introduced himself to the group around the table: Department heads, county attorneys, school board members and the superintendent, the fire chief and sheriff, other constitutional officers, and Supervisors’ aides.

“You have the Governor’s Executive Order, giving me full authority over Loudoun as its Administrator. Each of you will report to me, starting now.” Townsend waiting for the expected mumbling and groaning. One attendee protested, “You can’t do that!”

Not one to fuss around, Townsend answered, “I can and I will. I won’t abide a negative attitude, so you’re fired as of this minute.” The other bureaucrats were shocked, then fearful.

Townsend spoke. “We will rethink the county’s mission. We work for the citizens and keep them safe. That’s foundational. We will maintain the community’s health and prosperity. We’ll efficiently tend to necessities like roads and bridges. We will not engage in social matters or divisive political issues. Understood?”

All heads but one nodded – the school superintendent smirked, figuring his position was safe.   

The Chopping Block

Townsend noticed that expression. He faced the cocky superintendent. “The schools’ mission is to teach basics – science, reading and writing, history and so forth. You will not get into social issues. You will always cede authority to parents. Your construction projects will be designed and managed by county staff, not by you – the schools you build cost twice as much as they should. Your LCPS headquarters staff will be reduced by 50 percent. No new schools will even be proposed without my approval, especially since we’ll be in a no-growth mode. Do you understand?”

“No, I don’t understand,” challenged the school chief, comfortable with his sinecure.

“I warned about negativity. You’re fired.”

The remaining attendees shuddered as the superintendent slunk away.

A New Vision

Townsend expounded on his ideas, “Pro-growth folks present the idea that we must accommodate everybody who wants to move here. They try to dress up that claim by calling this ‘Unmet housing needs.’ That’s a crock. In fact, we will stop residential growth. Over 440,000 people live here now – that’s more than enough.”

A few attendees nodded.

Townsend went on, “The economy is prospering and I don’t see any value in expanding it.  We won’t give money to organizations that promote growth or more tourism There’s also the problem of breweries and event centers. We have more than enough and I won’t allow any more.”

Those at the table looked glum as Townsend continued, “So, I’m essentially saying that Loudoun is doing well and more growth should not be allowed. As they say,” concluded Townsend, “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.”

“Now, let’s talk about the government,” he said. “Some politicians say they lack staff and that staff is underpaid. Nope. Efficiency is the new byword. So, by the end of this month every department will reduce its staff by 20 percent. No exceptions. The way to make that less painful is to end non-critical programs.”

Townsend expected the grumbles so he closed with a promise. “Do all this, make sure your departments are run this way and for the benefit of the citizens and you will be rewarded.”

Epilogue

Within six months Loudoun was lean, efficient and humming. Some thirty proposed subdivisions had been prevented and thousands of acres saved. School test scores were on the rise. Crime was down. County employees had a bounce to their steps and smiled. Taxes were reduced by 25 percent. The fire chief could not adapt and left for Boston. A trickle of others also left.

Townsend was grooming his successor, a young woman in the finance department who was fanatical about cutting costs. Loudoun’s future looked bright.

The spirit and ideas of Robert Townsend had become pervasive and counties elsewhere were studying the new Loudoun model. As for Townsend, he was celebrated by Governor Spotswood.

Mission accomplished; Townsend then slowly faded into the ether.

Charles Houston developed more than six million square feet of office buildings through out the south for an Atlanta-based firm. He lives in Paeonian Springs.